In today’s newsletter, we invited recipients to take time with each of these questions and do their own personal relationship assessment exercise. Try it out:
1) What is the level of Mutuality in my relationships? Can I offer and receive support, or am I always in the role of being the ‘one-in-need of help’, or the ‘helper’? Am I stuck in a pattern of being ‘one-up’ in relationships, or, possibly,‘one-down’?
2) Is there an explicit agreement in my relationships that we are committed to each other’s growth and positive evolution?
3) Do my relationships reflect a commitment to core values, such as, the Good, True, and Beautiful, that give life meaning and purpose?
4) Do my relationships have a built in understanding that ‘messes and mistakes’ are part of the interpersonal territory, and self-correction and repair essential to the human experience?
5) Can I be my best and most authentic self in my relationships? Do I call forth the best from the Other?
6) What are my agreements about Feedback in my relationships? Do I seek it out, welcome it, and invite both constructive and appreciative feedback? Do I take risks and inquire: ‘What is the impact I have on you?’ or ‘What do you think are blind-spots I have about myself?’
And, finally, we leave you with the mindfulness statement we use in our Patterns of Relationships class:
“Relationship is all there is…”
You can say this phrase to yourself when you are in a relaxed state of mind, and just notice what happens in your sensations, thoughts, feelings, or movement impulses.
If you are interested the theme of Relationship, this class will be taught in Boulder, CO, in March of 2013.